72 Worst Names That Might Make You Wonder What Their Parents Were Thinking
What do you think when you hear words like Miso, Emperor, or Kale? Well, I guess we’re all thinking the same. But what if I tell you this is how parents name their kids? And celebrities are notorious for that—just think of X Æ A-12, the baby of Elon Musk and Grimes, Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow’s daughter Apple, and Suri, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes’s daughter. And it gets even weirder than that.
So today, we’re diving into a notorious collection of the weirdest, most unfortunate, hilarious names people have heard. It will make us question the role names have in our lives, and make us wonder if they should maybe be taken a little more seriously.
After all, the world is already cruel enough, and if there’s a name tag “Ana L.” on a guest card, it may as well be given a chance to show its nasty side. So, hey parents, yes, we’re looking at you, please tell us, what on earth were you thinking on that day?
#1 Harry Baals For Mayor
#2 New Post Go Ad-Free Saw A Guy Jerking It On TV
#3 These Were The Names Of My Dad's Teachers In Pre-School
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The name, whatever it’d be, is really up to parents to decide. I mean, it would all be so much scarier if the kids could name themselves at the age they’re smart enough to decide. But since people can’t walk around with numbers as if it was some twisted Squid Game-like scenario, they have to be called something.
But little do people who have never been in such a position know, naming babies is harder than one might think. The one at the top of your list could get an automatic veto from your partner. And deciding to share your choice with your friend may lead to strong opinions you weren’t expecting. And if after all the sleepless nights, you come up with a combination, you come to realize that the initials are the last thing you want for the kid.
#4 Boss Last Name
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#5 Tiny Kox
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#6 And The Award For The Worst Name Goes To
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So how do you pick a name that will stand the test of time and the judgment of others? First off, you should get ready for the fact that the first name idea may not be the one. Ask yourself if this moniker will sound good, or rather, completely ridiculous in 10 years. Will other kids be able to shout that name out loud in a school yard? And will the child be condemned for explaining their name to every stranger they meet?
Avoiding passing trends when naming a kid is a great idea. Names to avoid include things like misspelled names (think Jakxsen and Rybekkah), random punctuation that serves no purpose (Prin’cess and D’Lilah), pop-culture references (Khaleesi and Katniss), word names with a strange spelling twist (Diezel and Spontaniouse), and out-there hipster names (Amadeus and McCoy).
#7 Gay Saylor
#8 Yes, I'd Like To Open A Bank Account. Oh, My Name? Uhhh...
#9 That's An Even Better Name You Have There
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If you’re wondering why you should reflect on all these things when thinking of how to name your child, the research has a point to prove. This study from Marquette University suggested that unusual names are associated with less positive outcomes in life. It found that people with common names were more likely to be hired and researchers at the University of New York discovered that people whose names were easier to pronounce occupied higher positions.
#10 Now That's A Great Name For A Neuroscientist
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#11 Sackrider
#12 Ok Suk Whang
#13 Fagley Dork
#14 Saw This Last Name On The News Today
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#15 Dr. Grossweiner
#16 What An Interesting Name...
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#17 I Found The Worst Name
#18 A Republican Candidates Unfortunate Name
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#19 Beezow
#20 It’s In The Name
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#21 Perfect Name For A Lawyer
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#22 I See Your Most Unfortunate High School Teacher Name, And Raise You A Most Unfortunate Elementary School Teacher Name
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#23 Worst Name Ever
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#24 Omg
#25 “Hey Guy, What’s Your Name?”
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#26 The Big Question Of The Commonwealth Games
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#27 Wow, These Names Exist?
#28 Judge Willie Stroker
#29 I Met This Guy Ar Burger King, A Asked If I Could Take A Picture. It Was His Real Name!
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#30 B. J. Day
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#31 Best Name For A Bbc News Correspondent
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#32 Unfortunate Name
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#33 You'd Think You Have A Bad Name Until You Meet This Guy
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#34 Honestly, I'm Not Surprised To See Someone With A Name Like This In Small Claims Court
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#35 Judy Graham Swallows
#36 That Name
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#37 Dat Ho
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#38 Here’s To The People With Unfortunate Names
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#39 Sheila Butt
#40 I Think Asians Get Hate Because Of Their Complicated Names
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#41 Poon Ho
#42 To Briefly Return To A Previous Theme Of “Great Names”.if You Need A Vasectomy In The Austin Texas Area - Dr Dick Chopp Is Your Guy
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#43 Misty Hyman
#44 Worst Name For A DJ Ever
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#45 Best Or Worst Pediatrician Name?
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#46 Rich Will Wanket
#47 Basically The Worst Name Ever
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#48 Translated From Arabic, It Is A Female Lawyer's Name: Athraa Alhasny
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#49 Lucious Pusey
#50 Ballitch
#51 The Best Worst Name Ever Given To A Child
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#52 Surely A Form Of Child Abuse?
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#53 Tokyo Sexwale, The Best Name In The Universe?
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#54 Isaac Butt
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#55 Worst Name Ever
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#56 Love Hurts
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#57 Please Tell Me His Middle Name Is Claude!!??!! Anyway, The British Are About To Launch There Secret Weapon Against Covid, Operation Bloodsport-Kickboxer-Timecop!
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#58 I Have An Unfortunate Last Name. Sometimes I Get Targeted Advertisements, That Can Go Horribly Wrong
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#59 Ironic Title And Name Of Person In This Article In The Newspaper
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#60 Clint Head Is The Worst Name To Be Capitalized
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#61 Great Name For A Marijuana Researcher
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#62 Rip Torn
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#63 Tabaccojuice
#64 Here’s To The People With Unfortunate Names
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#65 Can't Decide If This Is The Best Or Worst Name Ever
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#66 Jakob Fugger
#67 My Sister In Law Doesn’t Have A Middle Name. Her New Middle Name Is Now None
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#68 Unfortunate Name Tag I Found At Work
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#69 Very Unfortunate Name Indeed
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#70 Worst Name Ever?
#71 When You Think Criminal Names Aren't Obvious Enough
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#72 What An Unfortunate Name This Dude Has
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