43 People Share “They Are Not Going To Last” Moments They Experienced At Weddings
Fairytales usually end with the newlyweds living happily ever after but who still reads Hans Christian Andersen when Reddit offers one trainwreck of a story after another?
Recently, u/Olya_roo made a post on r/AskReddit, inviting people to share what wedding moment made them think the couple is not going to last long. At first, it may sound odd. After all, a wedding is a celebration of love. A new beginning. Not the end. Plus, there's enough booze to drown all the uncertainty at least until the day after. But that's not always the case.
As of today, the post has 85K upvotes and 24K comments, many of which describe the red flags that sometimes arise on the big day. Below are some of the most memorable ones.
#1
Groom got into a fist fight with the father of the bride. Split after 4 months.Context- Groom and brides dad (actually most people in these families if I'm honest) have pretty aggressive drinking problems. Father in law has always hated him. I wasn't around for what actually set it off but it ended when the bride got in the middle, got an elbow in the eye and the happy couple left for the night. This was in rural Canada. Not Letterkenny, but basically Letterkenny. I'd say the father in law won the fight though.
Image credits: screamingincaps
#2
She told me two days before that she found her fiancé annoying and that she didn’t like him and that he was AWFUL in bed.She was visibly, endlessly uncomfortable at the rehearsal wedding/dinner combo.
Then she sobbed the ENTIRE morning, day-of. She ended up not getting any makeup done cause she wouldn’t stop scream-sobbing and refused to get dressed, stalling the wedding ~35 minutes.
She then said 45 minutes of “vows” that she had prepared (9 pages of things like inappropriate vows to friends and family, his parents and sisters, none of them her husband), and then ALMOST didn’t say “I do”. Managed to get a, “uh, yeah, okay, yeah I do” out of her almost a full 60 seconds after she was supposed to say anything.
I could go on for HOURS, but it was the most painful and awkward wedding I’ve ever been to. I’ve got my money on 10 months. We’re 1 month in.
Image credits: brbdead
#3
A fun light-hearted dance with the groom followed by a close and slow dance with her male best friend.Lasted 18 months and now she's living with the "friend".
Image credits: codyish
#4
Prior to my wedding I’d asked my husband to practice dancing with me because I’m uncoordinated, due to a disability. He blew me off and said we’d be fine. As we were dancing, he spoke in my ear, not even quietly. “What are you doing? What’s wrong with you? You’re embarrassing me!!” We lasted 2 years. Leaving was the best decision I ever made.Image credits: Edavis050694
#5
At my aunts wedding.Pastor: “Repeat after me…. For Richer and for poorer” The bride: “ for richer and for richer”
Yea they didn’t last long
Image credits: ItsAlecito
#6
Portuguese wedding. Fist fight broke out at the head table during the reception. Between two groomsmen. They were arguing about which of them had slept with the bride first. Groom was oblivious.He came home from work early one day two years later and caught her in bed with another man. Surprised it took that long.
Midnight buffet was amazing though.
Image credits: hernes63
#7
When the groom went in for the kiss after their vows and the bride presented her cheek instead. They divorced less than a year later after it was discovered she had been cheating on him pretty much their entire relationship. I hope you're doing better Isaac.Image credits: Half-Bastard
#8
I used to work for an event center that hosted a lot of weddings pre-Covid.After one ceremony I saw the groom slap the butt of one of the bridesmaids in the hallway. She laughed and with a big smile said, "Oh Jeremy, you'll never change!"
Image credits: ChillyWillie03
#9
The part of the vows where you pledge monogamy? The audience laughedImage credits: darthaquaticmammal
#10
I was at a wedding when a phone went off during the ceremony.In the middle of exchanging vows.
It was the grooms.
He took the call.
They are divorced now.
Image credits: TomppaTom
#11
The bride told her bridesmaids that she didn’t actually want to get married. Multiple times. No one told the groom until after the divorce.Image credits: TaylorSwiftsClitoris
#12
Two friends of mine got married, and when they gave their vows, the guy started laughing at the part about being faithful. Oops.Image credits: Shakespurious
#13
The groom had a “best woman” instead of a best man. Nothing wrong with that, but her toast left the whole room in awkward silence because she was clearly in love with him.Image credits: summerreyner
#14
When they disappeared for half an hour during the reception. They were both “saving themselves for marriage” and were desperate to bone down. Which is a fine thing to want. But it turns out that was more or less the main reason they got married. They made it almost a year.Image credits: ericdavis1240214
#15
When she went alone on her honeymoon, because she booked a trip to the caribbean despite her newlywed husband having a severe sun allergyImage credits: Short_Perspective72
#16
The entire bridal party, including parents of the wedded couple, entering in to a betting pool of how long the marriage would last, at the wedding reception.IIRC the best man won (price is right rules) at 14 months
Image credits: jiggajim
#17
When the groom started off his speech by saying, “we all know I didn’t want to get married but we’re here for bride and child we had together_.”1 year, 3 months later they were finished.
Image credits: blkwid0w
#18
The groom took the stupid cake thing to an extreme. The bride had given him his bite, and mushed a little on his chin or nose. He then took a piece and MASHED it into her face so hard that I was expecting her to end up with a bloody nose. Cake and frosting got up her nose, in her eyes, down the front of her dress, etc.The bride had to go get cleaned up, had her makeup re-done, and was ugly-crying within an hour of saying, "I do." He didn't give a damn.
Image credits: erik_working
#19
I was at the wedding of one of my mum’s oldest friends and she clearly had more fun dancing with the best man after the wedding.Long story short, they dated for a while after the divorce.
Image credits: JackTheJackerJacket
#20
My brother’s ex-wife. Throughout the exchange of vows, she was looking at everyone but my brother, making sure all eyes were on her. Later, she instructed the photographer (a family friend who was cheap) to “mingle” and get shots of people “being happy”. Within 10 minutes, she’d summoned the photographer back shouting, “Whose wedding is this?! I meant get shots of people being happy for me.”#21
Groom slept with another groomsman the night before he married his wife. Wanted to go to a gay bar at the bachelor party. Came out two years into the marriage. Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.#22
Wedding videographer here, I think my favorite moment was when I was sitting at the miscellaneous table with all the randoms and the girl next to me, the grooms ex, drunkenly admitted to sleeping with the groom a few months prior#23
When there's name calling. I particularly cringed at "it's because we so get each other and are so comfortable that he can call me dumb slut as a nickname." They didn't last the year.#24
One where the wedding was all about the groom promoting his band. He even "sang his bride a song" that was literally just him showing off his vocal range with some classic piece. She stood up and joined him on stage half way through and he looked annoyed that he had to share the limelight. They lasted about 2 years (he was sleeping with the other vocalist in the band.)#25
When he raised his eyebrows and gave her a knowing look during the “for richer or for poorer” portion of their vows.For context, he was a newly drafted pro athlete and she was a big fan of his signing bonus
#26
When the maid of honor professed her love for my brother during her toast at my brother's wedding... and her husband walked up to the head table, picked her up and carried her away before she could embarrass him further. They lasted about 3 months after that. My brother and his wife on the other hand are still happily married 20 years later.#27
I was the best man at a wedding a few years back. At the rehearsal dinner, his future in-laws were treating him like cr*p. They were bossing him around, making him do cr*p, and talking down to him. They didn’t let him hang out with his groomsmen afterwards while the bride went out and got drunk.They are now divorced.
Image credits: Actuaryba
#28
Her friends took turns motorboating her (females), and he said, get it out of your system as after tonight you never get to do that again. Was a good sign also when she dove into the pool with her bridesmaids at the reception...in her wedding dress.#29
Don't know what happened... Sat down with bride and groom, filling out the contract. Got the deposit. He stood up, said forget it, and walked out. 2 months later I get told the wedding is off, 3 months later she calls to rebook, different groom. Day of the wedding I am at the church... Got the final payment the week before... No one shows... No one, just me and the DJ.#30
One of my friends got married, afterwards she looked at me, crying, and said " what did I do? ". They were separated by the time the plane landed from their honeymoon. He was a good guy, she was a mess.The beta fish in the flower centerpieces lasted longer than the marriage.
#31
My husband was the best man at a wedding. The bride was a nightmare. Not just during the wedding, but in general everyday life. All of the friends hated her, and she had no friends of her own.We knew it was doomed when: during the portraits, the bride was making everyone miserable as can be. The groom said (exact words):
"I'll just send her to therapy. And, if that doesn't work, we can just get divorced."
#32
I was maid of honour. Me, best man and the couple went into a separate little room to do the signing stuff. Bride excused herself to go the bathroom and the groom started making pretty mean remarks about her cooking (sth she's passionate about) to the officiary. She came back, heard they were talking about cooking family meals together and gave him the warmest smile, thinking he had praised her. He scoffed awkwardly and changed the topic. That always stuck with me. He wasn't laughing WITH her but AT her, behind her back.They lasted 7 months.
#33
Bride disappears right after dinner for about an hour. After she returned, groom's father comes up and asks for the mic. Proceeds to announce to the entire place that his son's new bride was just upstairs schtupping her ex boyfriend, and that the marriage is over.#34
Groom was going after the garter - blindfolded. Picked the wrong girl (Maid of Honor). Should have known it wasn't his bride when the garter wasn't there. Had his head up her dress for WAY too long!#35
The bride and groom did the first dance then spent the rest of their reception completely apart from each other getting shit-faced with their own separate friend-groups. The only other dancing all night was the bride dancing with her high school friends, the father-daughter dance and the mother-son dance, during which the groom was crying. The best man's speech didn't mention the bride at all and basically boiled down to "Groom, you're married now but our bond is older and stronger, all of our hunting and fishing trips together are the best thing in our lives, can't wait for more." Such a sad, desperate atmosphere. They made it a little over one year.#36
Just before the wedding started my mother turned to me as said “You are making the biggest mistake of your life, if we get in the car and leave now I will never say another word”She was right…
#37
The groom and best man had a dancing routine for getting into the church ceremony and they got nearly halfway through it and I guess the groom felt they hadn't received much applause and wows from us the attendees and decided to go back to the entrance and start all over. Sigh...#38
The most beautiful wedding I've been to ended in divorce. Venue was where the groom's father is buried and he cried as he made his vows to the bride there.Turned out he'd been cheating on her for months and they divorced a while later. Something so repugnant about marrying someone you're cheating on practically over your father's grave. To date it's the only wedding I've been to that ended in divorce.
#39
He complained she was mean to him throughout their dating life. The day before the wedding all of the groomsmen and the grooms friends told him not to marry the girl. Like straight up.They lasted less than a year.
#40
When he smashed the cake in her face and hair, then went off drinking with his buddies. In 12 weeks, she filed. Good thing I didn't buy an expensive gift.#41
An infamous one for me was leaving a venue late one night and as I’m walking to the train I can see the bride down an alley, on her knees with the best man.#42
Had an old boss who was divorced. He told me once "I should have known it wasn't going to last when the only happy moment I had on my wedding day was when I snuck out to smoke weed with my buddies in the parking lot."#43
I was kindly included in a last-minute plus-one to the wedding of a family friend who I'd never met before. At the rehearsal dinner (or the German equivalent, the Polterabend) the guests smashed ceramic and porcelain items on the ground. I was fresh in Germany, so this was all pretty out of context and frightening, but my boyfriend explained that it's a tradition - reminding the couple that life is sometimes difficult and you have to work together to clean it up.The bride kind of half-heartedly motioned to the groom to sweep it up. He did a little bit, then just moved on to talk to his friends, leaving most of the shards strewn around the yard. Additionally, I don't think I saw the couple talk to each other once over the next three days of celebrations.
It was a gorgeous wedding, and I'm so grateful that I was invited (really good way to begin living in a new country), but it wasn't surprising to hear that they'd divorced a few years later.
No comments