81 People Describe The Moment They Realized They Had Met The Dumbest Person Ever
4 in 10 Americans believe that humans were created in their present form about 10,000 years ago, showed this Gallup survey, a belief that will likely raise many eyebrows among the educated rest of the world.
Meanwhile, psychologists say that in order “to understand American anti-intellectualism, it’s important to realize that smart people can embrace dumb ideas.” But the truth is, it’s not only Americans in particular who fall victims to clearly fake bits of wisdom. Nobody is immune to that, but it doesn’t make it any less cringy.
So when someone on Reddit asked a seemingly basic question “who was the dumbest person you met?” the answers started flowing with each one overshadowing the previous one. And although we can’t jump to conclusions to determine someone’s sheer level of stupidity just from a single post, it doesn’t mean we can’t at least eye-roll on repeat.
#1
I know a woman who bragged on Facebook that she scored 84 on her IQ test.... She thought it was out of 100.
Image credits: Mr_Nonesuch
#2
My ex-gf thought rhinoceroses were dinosaurs. Then, we were watching King Kong and toward the end of the movie she asked if it was based on a true story.
Image credits: AnthropomorphicMango
#3
A friend’s partner said she was vegan. Another friend jokingly said ‘you’re not vegan, you eat corn on the cob, which is actually the spine of a cow’. Aforementioned friend’s partner started crying about how much she loved eating cow spine and was really upset, genuine tears of sorrow at how she wasn’t a vegan at all.From that day forth, corn was known as Cow spine on the cob and their relationship didn’t last for too long, probably a week after she asked why Mel Gibson didn’t just phone the English King to negotiate in Braveheart.....
Image credits: Neon_Tusk_of_Camblor
#4
Ex-girlfriend. I once said out loud "I wonder how dolphins have sex?" She said, with conviction "There aren't boy dolphins and girl dolphins. They're just dolphins." You know, like magical.And she argues with me for about 2 hours.
Image credits: OttieandEddie
#5
Met a dude sophomore year of college. I told him the story of the dumbest person I had ever met up to that point and his response was “well.. that’s understandable though... up until last year I didn’t know the U.S. and the United States were the same thing”We went to college in the U.S. and again this was our sophomore year. Dude was an 19 year-old full blooded American.
Image credits: Sauced_Churchill
#6
My former boss was worried that the island of Manhattan would sink with all the extra visitors for New Years and the ball dropping. She thought islands float and when she found out that wasn’t true she thought it was so funny that she told everyone the story.She was later fired for withholding a pay raise from someone on her team because he didn’t accept her sexual advances. He had the texts to prove it.
Image credits: joao2706
#7
Flat earthersAnti vaxxer
People who think crystals can heal you
#8
In college a girl told me she had SIDS when she was a baby.
Image credits: AznHeidrun
#9
A customer who thought he should be able to get the Jordan Bred 11s for 90% off because of 2 "coupons" he had. One of these coupons was a print out of a 70% off clearance promotion from Nike's website and the other was a 20% off coupon from Payless that expired in 2017. I've never been more confused, frustrated, and exasperated than I was during the 10 minute interaction where myself, two managers and a customer tried to explain to this man why this wasn't going to happen.
Image credits: DarkManX437
#10
Had a friend in HS that could predict rain by looking at the stars....if the big dipper was upside down "the water would pour out and it would rain tomorrow" She was 17
Image credits: Justme124
#11
Friend thought syphilis was what you got from eating raw chicken. He told our whole economics class he got syphilis one time.#12
One of my classmates told me I was racist and reported me to the principle after I mentioned Nigeria in geography class#13
I remember when I was little my brother continued to have many strange misconceptions, but I can’t remember any except the one where he said “Martin Luther King Jr. was one president of the U.S. Otherwise, how could he have stood on a podium?”
Image credits: Platypus-Olive-27
#14
Had a guy tell me that he could write with his left and right hand equally well. He said that he was “amphibious”.
Image credits: dwalters43
#15
My neighbours taking the batteries out of the carbonmonoxide detector because it was making noise almost every day.#16
Uncle telling us about a guy he worked with. Guy buys a nice, new car. Car comes with cruise control and built in GPS. Guy wrecks new car. Apparently he typed in an address and set the cruise control... He thought that he didn't have to drive after setting in where he wanted to go, the car would just take him where he wanted to go.#17
For months, I've been dealing with a client who doesn't get their bills.Every month, they call and ask where it is, we confirm their address and the expected arrival date, I manually generate a new invoice, and e-mail it over.
Today, when confirming the address for like the 6th time, they said "oh, no, that's not my town or zip" and submitted an address change.
How the hell do you not know where you live?
Image credits: MyNameIsRay
#18
My old roommate. He put an electric kettle made of plastic on the stove. I came upstairs to black smoke as it melted. I threw it in the trash and yelled at him for nearly burning the house down. It has a cord sticking out of it and everythingAn hour later I came back upstairs to the same thing. [He] went through the trash and put it back on the stove.
I get the first time if he's never seen an electric kettle before but a second time? With the same kettle? A melted kettle? The guy doesn't even do drugs.
#19
1 girl in my friends class (17) legitimately asked if there have been people on the sun to her geography teacher, he almost died of a heart attack right there#20
in third grade, i was talking with another kid about kiwi birds and she proceeded to tell me that those birds laid kiwi fruit instead of eggs#21
Dated a girl from work first year of college. On first "date", we decide to just make something simple at her place. Being rich college students, we settled with Mac and cheese and wine.Get to the kitchen, and she says, "OK honest question. When boiling water, do you get the pot hot first, then add the water, or the other way around?"
Yup, she didn't know how to boil water. I just... don't know how someone makes it through life not knowing how to boil water on the stove.
#22
In fourth grade we had a motivational speaker come in and talk to us who was completely blind since birth. At the end they had time for questions and a girl asked why they didn't just wear super thick glasses. When the person replied that they cannot see ANYTHING, so there would be nothing to magnify, the girl said "No like SUPER thick glasses." We were only in fourth grade but we all were looking at her like how do you not get this. The blind dude just shook his head.#23
“I’m on a soup and water diet”“Tonight’s soup is creamy bacon potato”
#24
My first girlfriend, about 20 years, I showed her one of those newspapers at the time that had made up stories about alien abductions etc, Weekly World News I think it was. One of the headlines was "Belgium Destroyed By Giant Asteroid And No One Noticed For 2 Months" and she thought it was real. Thing was she wasn't actually dumb, just really innocent and naive#25
A girl who agreed on time changes but disagreed I was talking to her on my Sunday when it was her Saturday. I lived in Australia at the time#26
Worked at a bank for a (blessedly) short time. Had a 60 year old woman that asked, “What do you mean my account balance is negative?? I still have checks, so I still have money!”
Image credits: raspberryhefe
#27
A girl I used to work with in a call centre. She used to ask me stuff like “why do trees grow upwards?” or “the sun goes round the earth doesn’t it?” Then one day she asked me “does the earth spin and clouds stay still, or does the earth stay still and the clouds move?”I miss you Ria!
Image credits: RaulTheHorse
#28
True story. Kid in my neighborhood. Someone must have told him that if he shone a flashlight in one ear, light would come out the other ear. He didn't know i was looking. He held a flashlight to one ear and his open palm at the other. He turned on the light and tried to turn his head real fast to see his palm. He did this several times. Never caught the light. I was in awe at his stupidity.
Image credits: Jack6503
#29
Let me tell you about this woman that my uncle dated for a while. She was really a special kind of dumb. I'm just gonna go ahead and list the top 3 that I can remember, but I'm sure there's more. These were all relayed to me years later as I wasn't around at the time. It's a running joke between some family members.•Thought pork chops came from horses.
•Met a guy who had lost a portion of his ear in some kind of accident. Upon meeting she just asked him with no class at all: "Hey, what happened to your ear?" His response: "I turned my head too fast and bit my earlobe off." She was totally cool with that answer.
•Went grocery shopping and assumed that whatever number of chicken legs came in a pack was how many legs that chicken must have had.
There was also something to do with a moose, but I can't remember the specifics on that.
Image credits: Theearthhasnoedges
#30
A lady said you could get AIDs from sitting in a chair.#31
My brother’s ex. She couldn’t follow the plot line of a very simple Disney movie. She was in her mid-twenties.#32
I knew a girl in my year 9 geography class who was convinced bears don’t exist. She did however believe in polar bears. Just not other types of bear.#33
Dude I used to work with asked “how do islands stay in one spot if the ocean tide changes the way it does?”I had to walk away
#34
A girl thought you had to poke your (rather women had to poke their nipples), nipple for the milk to come out. Like with a literal needle.#35
I remember a few years ago I was in the middle of a French class with this girl I knew. I don’t know what started it, but the pair of us ended up in an argument which then turned into an argument of who was smarter. The teacher decided to test this by asking her where the Eiffel Tower was. She full heartedly replied that it was the massive glass building in the city we were in.She thought the Shard in London was the Eiffel Tower...while we were sitting in the middle of a French class...in South London...with a view of the Shard from our window.
And she was serious about it too. I thought it was just a joke but then afterwards she refused to listen to reason after claiming the River Thames was in Africa. I’m pretty sure she was pulling my leg but I just had to stare at her for a second to try and process what she was thinking.
#36
Girl in my high school history class thought mount Rushmore naturally grew like that#37
I worked in a restaurant with a woman who couldn’t give change back from a nickel. Needless to say, she lasted a week.#38
I worked a security post with a guy who didn't understand the concept of gravity. I thought he was joking at first, but he was serious. To be fair to him, he did pick it up pretty quick when I taught him.#39
My ex, convinced her that rubbing a portable speaker on her head would charge it because of the static electricity .#40
When I was in middle-school (like age 12-14ish), we went to the local college. I stopped by the college bookstore and bought a pack of gum. The gum was like $0.96 after tax.The clerk, a college-age girl, entered the gum in the cash register, and I gave her a dollar for the gum. She proceeded to count out $0.96 in change to me. I was so embarrassed for the girl, I didn't dare say anything, so I took the money. But then I felt bad and thought she might get in trouble, so I went back and asked her if maybe the gum cost $0.96 and she only owed me $0.04 in change.
I mean, hard to judge a person for one interaction. Maybe she was thinking hard about quantum mechanics and just couldn't devote enough mental energy to the Gum-Dollar Exchange Deficit Function. But it definitely lowered my opinion of college students at the time.
Image credits: JohnBarnson
#41
I met a kid in Army basic training who said that he had P-pneumonia (pronounced Pee-neumonia). He was convinced that it was a more serious form of pneumonia because it was P-pneumonia.#42
A girl in my class in high school asked the teacher where the sky was. Like she genuinely had no idea and when we tried to explain to her that the sky was above us outside she was like “no that’s the ceiling”.
Image credits: Cheese_BasedLifeform
#43
Ex-friend. Got in to an massive, almost physically violent argument and told her to leave my apartment and get out of the complex since she didn't live there. She said "I don't have to! This is government property!" I was like... no...just no...The police came and informed her opposite
#44
My landlord is an idiot. Two examples:We had an ant problem, and she cut the branch off the tree over the deck. Why? Because the ants were using the branch to get in the house to get water.
Squirrels were nesting under the deck. Solution? Spray them with water to get them out (worked). Cut off another tree branch so they couldn’t get to the deck. (Like trees are the only thing they can climb.)
#45
I don’t know about “dumbest person”, but I once had a student complain her grade changed every time I graded something. I use a total points system, points earned/points available *100=%I said yes, it will change every time because the numerator and denominator are changing every time I grade something; that’s how math works. Student said “I know how to do math” Me “I don’t think you do or we wouldn’t be having this conversation”
#46
This dumb girl I went to middle/highschool with.Blew the breaker to half the school when she decided to make instant cup noodles for lunch, but didn’t realize that she needed to use water.
The whole cup caught on fire.
#47
“Trees aren’t real, because they don’t move” -kid I overheard at a bus stop#48
A girl who believed Doner Kebab (The large versions of spits that they shave into gyro/kebab meat) were elephant legs. She was 21.#49
A woman who was a troop leader in my Boy Scouts troop (who was Mexican) said I was racist towards Mexicans and initiated an argument with me at camp. All because I didn’t like jalapeño peppers because I thought they were too spicy.#50
Had someone steal their roommates Credit card to buy a game at GameStop but used his own rewards card.#51
My ex. She didnt know what animal beef came from.#52
I met a woman in a small town in Alabama many years ago. While chatting, she said “I’ve never been outside the state. Well, except for that one time in Mobile.” [For those not in the US, Mobile is a city in Alabama.] The whole room got really quiet as we tried to figure out how to react.#53
My 25 year old gf had no idea how time zones work. She didn't believe me when I told her it was a different time on the east coast. I drew a rough sketch of America with the zones and she thought I was lying to her until I showed her that TV programs have different time listings.Yes, she was very pretty.
#54
In recent memory, the lady picking up photos from my workplace who said, "I'm not worried about COVID. I'm a healthcare worker. If I was going to catch it, I would have already."#55
one of my coworkers once said “racism didn’t start until the early 2000s”. i almost fell in the floor after he said that.#56
The other day, my friend asked me how many toes he had.#57
The girl who asked me if me and my brother could feel the same pain cause we're twins. As if the question wasn't stupid enough, my brother and I are around three years apart and she was in his year in high school#58
watching star wars with friends in high school. some girl we knew said " when did this happen?" I said the movie was made in the 70s . she said " no, the space fight?! when did we get into a space fight?!" she was dead serious, thought star wars actually happened.#59
A girl I was friends with purposely disagreed with legit facts because it 'made her different'#60
I was put in charge of training a girl at a coffee shop I worked at. She didn't know how to make coffee, I literally had to tell her "ok, now pour the coffee in until it reaches this line, no, pour it slower don't dump the whole pot over the cup." When trying to train her on register I don't know if she couldn't or just refused to count. A total would be $5.98 and she'd tell the person it was $6, when people gave her anything but bills she'd stare at the change and ask me how much that was or she'd say "that's $2 right?" And there'd be like 50¢ on the counter in dimes and pennies. I tried training her on sandwich station, she would pack the food frozen into the bags and just hand it out. On her breaks I'd have to constantly remind her that 15 minutes means 15 minutes, not 20, not 30, not an hour. We were allowed to have food at work for free within reason and only in the back. She would reach into the pastry case with her bare hand, pick up an item and just eat it at register or right next to the case. There was a lot more she'd do wrong and it got to the point where I thought she was trying to purposefully get fired
Image credits: 2baverage
#61
The lady who asked me how she was suppose to pour a pot of coffee."Uh, excuse me. How am I suppose to pour this?" While she's holding the pot of coffee.
"You pick it up and pour it?" I offered, with what was I'm sure, the saltiest look on my face followed by probably a good shock of wth?
#62
We were in history class, taking a pop quiz. one of the questions was "where is pearl harbor?" someone raised their hand and asked "who is pearl harbor? and why would I know where he is?" it's me. I had trouble focusing in school and thought pearl harbor was a person
Image credits: harpervalleyyy
#63
A classmate named Rebecca had many instances of just jaw-dropping idiocy. Two of my favorites were:After listening to a presentation on why a pool hall would be a great addition to a bar, “That’s great and everything, but where’s the pool?”
Reading out loud her paper on recognizable structures, “The Parthenon is important. Because it is big and it is good.”
I think it’s the confidence behind anything she said that just made it hard to overlook the ignorance.
#64
I was helping a guy and he asked me for directions in a state I'm not from. I told him I lived in Michigan(I don't) he said oh I don't know what country that is.Please don't breed
#65
Not me, but my father. He had gone hunting with a group of his friends (2-3 people), but one of his friends invited someone else. To keep this persons identity anonymous we will call him Kevin. Now, Kevin was an interesting one. When they first set out Kevin unloaded a clip into the air to and I quote "Warm up his rifle". Him doing this scared off all deer that were in the area. Kevin also consistently pointed his rifle at everyone in the group. Lets just say, my father didn't go hunting with him again. The only thing I'm confused about is how the hell did this guy pass hunter safety, the world may never know ¯#66
I don't know if she was joking or not but my mother asked me the other day why the earth wasn't sinking from becoming heavier from the increased amount of people living on itMaybe I'm the idiot for falling for it
#67
Good ole Roy. He was middle aged, fat, sounded like Bill Murray from caddyshack, looked like Bubbles from trailer park boys let himself go.He was my dad's coworker. One time Roy was told to sweep the parking lot, so instead he told my dad that the boss wanted my dad to do it. My dad was halfway through sweeping the lot when the boss caught him and was "where the hell is Roy?! I told him to sweep the lot!"
He gets fired and starts working at the Walmart I was working at. His first day, he vanishes for a few hours, gets nothing done and gets fired over it.
Last I saw him, he was picking up a younger tweaker chick, who obviously was in it for the drugs.
#68
Coworker - 100% believed unicorns are real and pissed off that live entertainment shows clip off their wings so they can’t fly away. Also, made a frozen pizza with the cardboard underneath it. Also, 9-11 was an inside job.#69
Randy.I worked with him when I was in my late teens, in a warehouse where we would put together Computer systems.
My name is Tracy, one day Randy looked at me and with the most serious voice/look asked me the following question...
Is your name, Tracy, "short for something"?
I said, hmmmm..
Well Randy, what do you think it could be short for?
He say's....Ummmm... Tracy-opolis.
Like maybe it was short for a Greek name. lol
On my Grave stone it will say....
Here lie's Tracy (short for Tracyopolis)
#70
In high school, there was this girl who was in English and we were reading Mice and Men. We were all popcorn reading and when it was her turn. She asked me what page we were on. I clearly told her the page and then proceeds to read the first page. Like what?! I told her the page and she straight up went to the first page. Even the teacher told her the page and she was still confused until the next person volunteered.#71
I once had a friend who grew up in New South Wales (A state in Australia - with the capital of Sydney) upon hearing I grew up in Perth, (the capital of a the state of Western Australia) ask me “Is W.A. near Perth?” She was mid 20s. Imagine having lived your entire life in a country but having no idea about the states and capital cities. I was dumbfounded.#72
Myself, i once had a very very very minor pain in my chest and my instant thought was im having a heart attack. I was 25 btw, turns out the pain was just from coughing...#73
In high school, there was this one girl in my history class. She went for an IQ test once. We wrote a history test in class, and a week later we get our tests back. This girl failed miserably and she decided it would be a smart idea to tell the teacher he can't give her an F because "she scored 70 on an IQ test so she's not allowed to fail." The worst part is, she genuinely believed an IQ test would give her a pass on failing tests, so she failed EVERY SUBJECT that year. I still talk to her on Twitter now and then, turns out she's a flat-earther now.#74
Had a bunch of friends round for a party, one of my buddies brought his girlfriend who was a dental nurse. We were playing Cards Against Humanity with the home rule that you could put your hand up if you didn't know a word and you'd be relentlessly mocked but have it explained.The girlfriend didn't know what the clitoris was.
Sex education is mandatory in our country.
She was a dental nurse so needed to have at least a basic understanding of human biology.
They eventually broke up and we still mock our friend for this! Usually by saying, "at least make sure your next girlfriend knows what her clit is"
#75
Dated a girl for a while who couldn’t grasp the concept of a mail-in rebate. No matter how many times I explained it. Simply, step by by step, she still never understood.#76
Everday I have people on the phone that redefine the words dumb, stupid and ignorant.For example one customer had trouble sending back a sack of birdseed. He outright refused to send it back himself, because he feared the big sack would kill him if he was caught in a car accident. So he demanded that we personally sent someone to him to take the bird seeds away. That isnt something we do so when this "request" was denied, he, and Im not kidding, set the fucking sack on fire, sent us the the pictures of it per mail and still had the audacity to demand a refund plus a fee for bothering him so much.
#77
Had a roommate who asked me why i bake bread if i could buy bread. Also asked me what i was gonna use a brush for, when i asked if she had a brush for her dog. She let her dog eat a brownie then blamed everyone else in the house for not watching the dog. She owed the person paying the rent like 800 dollars and continued to buy expensive kitchen appliances.#78
Today a friend told me that her coworker bought her THREE year old a VENTI Starbucks coffee because the kid wanted it??? It apparently has FOUR shots of espresso in it. My friend flipped on her coworker about it and the coworker said she didn’t know it was bad (?????????) because she doesn’t drink coffee and her child just told her what she wanted and she ordered it (?!!?????!!!?????). So, I guess I have not met her, but she is the dumbest person I’ve heard of in awhile and my brain is exploding thinking about this again.#79
One of my closest friends can be painfully stupid. She thought human eggs were tiny babies, not a single cell. That’s the standout situation because she argued about it with me for like half an hour.She also once told me and another one of our friends to stop talking about the classes we were thinking about taking because we were making her feel dumb. We were discussing our math class option for the next year and had decided we were probably going to take the basic one. The one she was going to do. Ugh.
#80
This guy I met when I was working at CFA. I was 15 at the time, and had just clocked off when we were busy. The guy walks up to me and says "Want some advice? Don't clock off when your team needs you" and he walked away.A lady police officer who overheard the whole thing said "Want some advice? Don't listen to idiots like him." She was super nice and I talked with her for15 minutes or so.
By the way, there is a $25,000 fine for your employer if you work past 9 PM and your 15-17 where I live
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