“[Am I The Jerk] For Ignoring My Sister’s Wedding Invite After She Didn’t Come To My Wedding?”

Let’s be honest – relatives and weddings are a truly inexhaustible source of a wide variety of stories that vividly reflect both the best and worst human qualities. And indeed, very often, we find out what exactly our loved ones are like precisely at weddings, our own or others’.

This may be a requirement for all guests to pay for food at their own expense, or a whole web of intrigues behind the newlyweds’ backs. It might be future in-laws’ disagreement that the bride should be walked down the aisle by her older sister who raised her alone, or maybe an entitled guest ordering fast food directly to the reception. And it also happens, for example, as happened in this tale by the user u/Reasonable_Cabinet54.

The author of the post planned her wedding before the pandemic and asked her half-sister to be the maid of honor

Image credits: Chauchi – It’s My Life (not the actual phot)

The woman agreed happily and didn’t change her mind after the wedding was postponed for a year due to quarantine restrictions

Image credits: u/Reasonable_Cabinet54

However, just a few days before the ceremony, the sister called the bride-to-be and said they couldn’t actually afford the long flight, blatantly RSVPing no

Image credits: Cottonbro Studio (not the actual photo)

Image credits: u/Reasonable_Cabinet54

Image credits: Bjørn Bulthuis (not the actual photo)

Image credits: u/Reasonable_Cabinet54

After the wedding the husband showed the author her sister’s post on Facebook, with pics of herself hanging out at a resort with her new guy

So, the Original poster (OP) says that shortly before the start of the pandemic, she and her future husband planned their wedding, and the author of the post invited her older half-sister to be her maid of honor. She, of course, happily agreed and even bought a dress in advance. What happened next, we all know very well – COVID-19 struck and quarantine restrictions were introduced, so the wedding had to be postponed for a whole year.

During this time, as the OP recalls, a lot of things happened. For example, her sister met a new guy and immediately decided to move in with him with all her children. Moreover, as our heroine says, the sister could not talk about anything except their upcoming life under one roof. Okay, dreams are great, but what about a wedding invitation? The future MOH confirmed her arrival again (she lived far enough away), but noted that they would probably be staying at a hotel.

But suddenly, when there were only a few days left before the wedding, the sister called the OP again and said that she and her boyfriend would not be able to come because they couldn’t afford a long flight (although initially, as the author of the post recalls, the woman planned to drive herself). Of course, the bride-to-be was incredibly upset – but what could she do? Especially when they informed all the guests in advance that they would not be able to fund their travel.

The wedding, however, went well. Yes, the bride’s side was one short, but practically no one paid attention to this. When getting into the newlyweds’ truck, though, the OP’s husband suddenly showed her sister’s post on Facebook, where she exposed herself with her boyfriend at a rather expensive resort, and also talked about their upcoming wedding venue. This was such a shock to the Original Poster that she literally blocked her sister on all platforms, and when she sent her wedding invitation, just threw it away without even reading it.

Image credits: Kindel Media (not the actual photo)

“The situation, to put it mildly, looks ugly on the part of the failed maid of honor,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, to whom Bored Panda reached out for a comment on this case. “The behavior of the heroine’s older sister looks pretty selfish. Yes, she apparently lied to her sister about the reason for refusing to come – but even in this case, she could at least not advertise her trip to the resort literally on the same day.”

“Probably, the decision to go to the resort on vacation was made even earlier, and ‘financial difficulties’ became just an excuse. In any case, I think it would be better to say it like it is – then, at least, the post on Facebook wouldn’t look so dismissive, and the relationship between the sisters would not have deteriorated dramatically,” Irina states.

Refusal of guests to attend a wedding is actually quite common. According to Best for Bride statistics, “the average number of people that say ‘no’ to a wedding is between 15 and 20%.” On the other hand, the statistics that are given are the guests who actually RSVP’d No quite in advance – and perhaps not the future maid of honor! Be that as it may, experts simply recommend “not to go berserk over any cancellations,” just be glad for what went well, and don’t stress out over what could have been. “Ultimately, your happiness matters, and don’t let anyone put a damper on it,” the source also claims.

But most commenters on the original post are not particularly restrained in their indignation towards the sister’s behavior. According to people in the comments, the woman clearly demonstrated that her sister isn’t important to her at all. The only thing that the commenters advise in this situation to the Original Poster is not to act like her entitled sister, and still politely, but coldly RSVP No to her own wedding invitation – probably with no explanation. What do you think of this?

Experts claim that such behavior is rather inappropriate, and commenters agree, yet pulling some angry punches at the author’s entitled relative

The post "[Am I The Jerk] For Ignoring My Sister's Wedding Invite After She Didn't Come To My Wedding?" first appeared on Bored Panda.